Susan Young
A typical morning when you live with a Dork

I am lying in bed, enjoying the peacefulness of the early morning. I faintly hear the coffee pot beep in the kitchen, indicating that our coffee is ready. I wait for the next sound that I know is coming; the quiet Whomp! of the Old Dogs paws hitting the bed in front of my husband's face. The Old Dog will wait patiently for about 15 seconds, and if his staring elicits no response, he will Whomp! his paws again. I hear my husband murmur his good mornings to the Old Dog, who then trots to the rug for a good roll on his back. Mission accomplished. The Timid Girl comes to me for her morning acknowledgment that the world is still safe. The Dork grabs a flip-flop, shoves it in the nearest faces, and begins to serenade us with the song of his people. This is how we awaken to each new day.
We start our day with cookies for the dogs and coffee for us. I sit on my corner of the couch with the Old Dog leaning against me, using my body as a giant pillow. The older he gets, the more contact he craves. The Timid Girl is quietly snoozing at my husband's feet. The Dork circles the house, looking out every window to ensure nothing has changed during the night. Eventually, the Old Dog moves to the floor where it is cooler. I get a second cup of coffee and open my book, wondering how much longer this peaceful morning will last.
Not long as I suspected, the Dork is bored. A bored Dork is an annoying Dork. First, he jumps up on the couch and stares down at me. I ignore him. His paw comes up and taps my shoulder. I wag my finger at him and tell him No. He lets out a sigh and jumps to the floor. He tries staring at my husband and emits a gurgling whine. Again, he is ignored. A few moments later, he is back on the couch, sitting with his back pressed against me. I know what's coming, so I set my coffee down as the Dork falls backward, draping himself across my lap, legs in the air as he gives me a big cheesy smile. I look down at him and frown. The smile vanishes as I see his eyes contemplate the next level of annoyance. Somehow he squirms his 85-pound golden mass around on his back, so instead of his face, I now have his, er, parts in my face. Ok, that's enough! Off! He jumps off the couch and contemplates his next move. He spots the Timid Girl and hits a play bow with a little growl. The Timid Girl takes him up on the offer of a wrestling match, so the Old Dog jumps on the couch to get out of their way, and my quiet morning is now over. I am off the couch and starting my day, my coffee is now cold, and I'm only two paragraphs further in my book. The Dork won again.
- Susan M. Young is a long standing Asheville, NC Real Estate Broker and has been active in dog sports with her Golden Retrievers for over 25 years. She can be reached through her website at www.SusanMYoung.com “The Dork” is a much loved juvenile Golden Retriever named Toke who alternates between being an incredible working dog and incredibly annoying when bored, which is any time he isn’t working.